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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29711994">explosion</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/PaulrissaRahany/pseuds/PaulrissaRahany'>PaulrissaRahany</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Law &amp; Order: SVU</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 17:54:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,114</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29711994</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/PaulrissaRahany/pseuds/PaulrissaRahany</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>spoilers for svu 22x07 &amp; the reunion of stabler/benson</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>explosion</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There had been something to that smirk that Finn had given her. Olivia had made plenty of friends and enemies, inside and out of the 1PP. Yet, the thought that someone could show up for an award for her was still daunting. After her mistakes over the past year, she didn’t feel worthy of an award, especially not in front of those she respected the most. </p><p>A few names floated around in her head. Melinda--Munch--Don--there were so many, but only one had her immediately hyper focused as Finn walked away. </p><p>It seemed nearly impossible that Finn would know of such a possibility, but she had been busy with work and Noah lately. The potential that Finn had caught on to something that she’d missed wasn’t impossible. In fact, over the next few weeks, she could see the way that he’d quickly glance at his phone when tough days would turn into long nights. He had left early on multiple Friday nights, even after commenting on Phoebe’s busy schedule. </p><p>There was something up, but the confrontation and the potential for eventual disappointment was too traumatizing.</p><p>She didn’t want to go to the event, but she listened to Finn. </p><p>Olivia trusted Finn, as always.</p><p>---</p><p>Perhaps, if she hadn’t been his partner for twelve years. Maybe if she hadn’t taught herself to be hyper aware of her surroundings. If she hadn’t learned his energy a decade earlier, she could have missed the looming figure in the back of the hall. </p><p>Where had he been for a decade? There had been so many moments that she had looked for him. Munch’s retirement--Cragen--hospital visits--her own accomplishments each had moments where she had scanned the crowd looking for the first blue eyes to give her the constant comfort of home.</p><p>And yet, he didn’t show for any of them. </p><p>Her speech is short, especially when she notices him inching towards the door. There would be a reception--an event where she’d have to bottle up her insecurities for a night. It was something she’d been much more prepared for fifteen minutes ago. It was something that made sense before she noticed him quickly leaving the celebration. </p><p>What kind of sick joke was he trying to play? A decade away--only to try and run away again?</p><p>“Olivia! This is Matt Andrews--he’s on the City Council,” Christian Garland had somehow managed to intercept her steps. His body blocked her gaze as she watched her partner, her ex-partner walk away from her once again. </p><p>“Uh--hi, I’m Olivia Benson,” she introduced herself, before realizing her mistake. They were here for her--to celebrate her. “I’m sorry--I think I just saw--I need to run outside for a minute.” </p><p>A pause. </p><p>An excuse. </p><p>She doesn’t pay attention to the passing faces, but she immediately opens the doors to outside. How can he think that she’d let him just walk away? Olivia may slap him, but after ten years, she deserves that. </p><p>Still, it all happened too fast. </p><p>The familiar blonde hair in the front seat. </p><p>The heat of an explosion. </p><p>People everywhere.</p><p>It felt like seconds and two cars were burning in front of her. There were local police already sectioning the car accident off while the sirens of the EMTs were permeating the air. She had blinked and the blonde wasn’t there...only flames. She hadn’t seen him in the car, but he had been leaving so he had to be somewhere.</p><p>She felt frozen to her spot, except she felt incredibly light on her feet. Olivia would never move again, yet she swayed as people rushed by her. </p><p>The smell of burning gasoline is enough to make her gag. It’ll be lingering in her hair--staining her clothing. She has to move--she has to silence the constant Elliot that is pounding in her skull. </p><p>Of course, her logic sees the burning car. The explosion that had caused the chaos around her, but if there’s a chance that she may help out in some way. “I--” she hesitates to move forward through the crowd. Yet, it’s futile when her knees buckle. There’s no promise that a step forward isn’t a guaranteed collapse.</p><p>Would she feel different if he had been in the car? It had been a decade without his presence, but the permanence of dea-this would surely alter her reality even after he left. </p><p>“Liv?”</p><p>It wasn’t relief, but it wasn’t sheer terror. The one syllable--gentle, predictable name--had been enough to bring her back to some type of reality. </p><p>“Elliot?” </p><p>Her eyes can't focus until she finds his blue eyes staring at her as he takes in the disaster around him. “What’s--Oh God, Kathy--” </p><p>Her world had irrevocably shifted, but within seconds it felt like nothing had changed. In the immediate, her heart wanted to know why she wasn’t good enough for him to stay, but her arms had already wrapped around him. </p><p>It’s not a hug--it’s not gentle. </p><p>It’s a desperate grab. </p><p>For seconds--mere moments, she had thought he was in the burning car. </p><p>“El, you can’t--please don’t.” Her voice cracks as she realizes that he’s easily able to overpower her grasp. This is Elliot Stabler--local family superman. He’d happily give his life if it meant saving that of Kathy’s. “She--she was there--and then she wasn’t. I thought--I thought you were in there. I don’t know where--You can’t go in there.” </p><p>Somehow he understands her terror. He doesn’t stop walking towards the crime scene, but he doesn’t leave her behind. She’s not wrapped in his arms, but he allows her to somehow stay attached to him.</p><p>“Was Eli in the car?” He hadn’t changed in a decade. He took charge of situations--somehow more level headed than anyone should be in this situation.“Liv, did you see a boy in the car?” </p><p>Blonde hair--flames--explosion--lights--loud noise. </p><p>There wasn't anyone else there. “No, she was alone. I didn’t see anyone else with her.” Her answers happen just in time for a scream to come from beside the ambulance. It’s a familiar scream from too long ago, but it’s one that she can tell they both recognize. “El--he wasn’t there. It’s just Kathy--” </p><p>“Which means that Eli is somewhere around here. They were together this afternoon,” he told her. “Listen, Olivia, I have to be with Kathy, but--” </p><p>She isn’t sure how she can recognize the stages of shock begin to trickle through Elliot, but her need to help him kicked her out of her own mind.</p><p>“Find Eli,” she concluded. “I’ll find him. Kathy needs you now.”</p>
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